Wow I've been slacking.

Forty days. Fifteen hours. Thirty minutes ago, I have birth to the most amazing child in the world. Kellen Andrew was born Feb. 12th 2013 and has since made our lives perfect. He is a good baby and only wakes up once at night typically. He hardly cries too.
I promise I write more soon! :)

24 days..

Where has the time gone? Everything has been rough. Headaches don't really go away. And bed rest looks more likely. I am thankful for a heathy baby boy and that he is already spoiled. :)
We are looking for our first house too. It's great. Minus kyles parents don't want us to leave. I understand they like having us around, but they also need to see the side where we need our own place because we cannot and will not live here forever.

56 days. And everything to complain about.

I hate this. But, Kellen is growing wonderfully! I'm depressed. I really want nothing more than our own house with a yard for Karson and Kellen to play and a space to call our own. And a shower that we don't have to share. I miss being able to wake up every morning happier. I want nothing more than to spend every day with MY little family. I don't want to hear about what I should or need to do. It's up to Kyle and I and anything that has to do with Karson or Kellens lives are in OUR control.
//end rant

Christmas Eve and 63 more days :)

Today is a day that is sort of harder to handle. While I love Christmas, it is crazy to think I won't be able to spend it where I normally am, at my moms house and then my grandmas. I am blessed to have two families that want to see me, and honestly maybe even three. I just wish this time of the year was easier. My mom is going through such a rough time and I hate that I can't make it better. My dad and stepmom bought me amazing gifts for Christmas, but I was so excited to see them and have Kyle with me, that I didn't even care what I got. My mom is coming over today to Kyles side of the family so we can do Christmas. All I want for Christmas is to see her happy. It is the hardest thing in the world to know she's not as happy as she should be. I love her though and that's the only things I can do or offer to her. She's wonderful but just hurting. Can't blame her there.
Kellen and I are doing a okay. No more hospital trips, no nothing. He moves regularly and Kyle has even started reading to him at night. Our little family is doing so well. I just wanna keep it going. I wanna keep everyone happy and be pleasant.
I want everything how Christmas in my mind should be. I can't believe I'm growing up :/

12 days till Christmas

74 days till Kellen Andrew is due and only 12 till Christmas. It breaks my heart that my mom isn't in the Christmas spirit. I can't stand that the stepcreep is soaking all of the enjoyment and happiness from her. I wish I could help her make things better, but I'm not good at it because she lets herself be tormented with him. I'd give almost anything for her to be happy again. I can't stand how much he brings her down. :/
Kellen is doing well. As of today my finals are finished and I have one more semester before graduation. I can't give up now! I am looking forward to a new chapter in my life. His arrival won't make things best, but he will bring too much joy to me. Day one of internship is Monday. No breaks for this momma.
Everything works out.
Nap time. More later<3

84 days. And I thought I couldn't do it

With 84 days left until my due date, I can't believe how close it is. I am of course excited, scared, nervous, flustered. But I know that I can handle it, mostly because I have Kyle right behind me telling me we can.
Kyle and I talked last night for the first time about how long it's actually been since we found out about the baby. We were thinking about when the baby was possibly conceived, and the fact that we were not ready. But someone obviously thought we were. Neither one of us could have done this alone.
Kyle is getting more excited by the day and so am I. I want to give Kellen everything I can and hopefully he will see how much I try to be a good mom. Kyle was laying with his head on my belly last night, an every night occurrence anymore, and Kellen kicked him so hard that his head bounced! We've got a scrapper in there! (: I hope he's as wonderful as I have him pegged in my mind to be, but I also bet he's even more wonderful.

At least things are going smoothly with Kellen and Kyle and Karson.
:)

Holidays are rough..

With everything going on with my pregnancy, even more is going on in the actual world around me. I wish everyone could spend more time happy. And honestly, we've been doing well with happy here. Kyle and I are doing great and it's so nice to have him help me out especially because I've been sort of down lately. I know people worry that there will be depression worse after I have the baby, but I'm excited to say I think this baby will help more when he's here. I'm so stressed out and praying for everything to work that I don't know what else to do. I really hope all this stress goes away. I have 91 days. And they are moving slower and slower. It's hard to focus on school and work when I wanna get excited about the baby. :(